It’s Halloween night and my porch light is off. This year I didn’t pull decorations from storage bins, and the only candy I bought to share was for a social activity at church earlier in the week. I manned one of the kiddie games inside; praised the children for their cute, scary, princess-y, and clever costumes; and repeated, “Happy Halloween,” in response to their “Trunk or Treat!” greetings while chucking assorted sweets into their buckets, bags, and pillowcases.
I didn’t even dress up (beyond wearing a smoky orange Florida Writers Association T-shirt emblazoned with I love the smell of ink in the morning).
I wasn’t actively avoiding Halloween, but until a few minutes ago I hadn’t thought of why I’d ignored so much more of it this year than last year, which I wrote about in Beware of “Happy Halloween” and Other Hazardous Good Wishes.
Then I came across today’s HuffPost Healthy Living post by Megan Divine, “Halloween and Grief: When the Nightmare Is Real.”
READ IT. (Please.)
Take your grieving friends some favorite candy (or a healthier treat) to show you’re thinking of them, but consider skipping the “Happy Halloween” greeting.
What to Say When Someone Dies 
I remember the first Halloween after my husband died. The faux graveyards, skeletons, zombies and such made me cringe and look away. That feeling has been tempered only somewhat by the years, but I still have an intense dislike for such decorations. This is my problem, and one that will come to those who decorate in such a manner soon enough. Until then there is nothing I can do while they revel in their innocence but hope they will have many years of it.
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I appreciate your attitude and I agree. I wouldn’t wish firsthand understanding on anyone. (Though it’s good to share as you’ve done here to help offer secondhand insight to those who want to be of support.)
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[…] Belated Halloween Reprise (including a link to Megan Divine’s HuffPost Healthy Living “Halloween and Grief: When the Nightmare Is Real“) […]
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[…] Belated Halloween Reprise (including a link to Megan Divine’s HuffPost Healthy Living “Halloween and Grief: When the Nightmare Is Real“) […]
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